In this very funny pun compilation, we have come up with and collected the best skinny puns, dad jokes and wordplay to make you LOL.
Hilarious Skinny Puns to Make You Laugh Out Loud:
1. I used to be skinny, but then I decided to turn over a new leaf.
2. Why did the skeleton go to the party? Because he heard they were serving boneless chicken.
3. I’m so skinny, I have to run around in the shower to get wet.
4. I accidentally ate a skinny pancake. It was a crêpe mistake.
5. Did you hear about the skinny scarecrow? He was outstanding in his field.
6. If you call a skinny psychic, does that make it a small medium at large?
7. I told my girlfriend she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
8. Why did the skinny comedian go broke? He couldn’t put on enough pounds to make ends meet.
9. My doctor told me I should start eating more but I’m just not that hungry… I’m not sure if it’s a lack of appetite or an excess of laziness.
10. I tried working out to get ripped, but now I’m just shredded cheese.
Top 10 Skinny Dad Jokes That Will Have You Rolling:
1. I used to be skinny, but then I turned the corner and found burger joint.
2. I tried to make a belt out of old watches, but it was a waist of time.
3. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
4. I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda last night. It was just a Fanta-sea.
5. I don’t trust stairs because they’re always up to something.
6. Can February March? No, but April May.
7. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
8. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
9. I’m reading a book on the history of glue. I just can’t seem to put it down.
10. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the park? They woke up.
Skinny Wordplays That Will Tickle Your Funny Bone:
1. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it… unless it’s skinny jeans.
2. I’m not a doctor, but I think I need more Vitamin Sea.
3. I’m trying to cut back on sugar, but I think I’m in denial.
4. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
5. I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know which comes first.
6. I told my wife she should embrace space. She took my advice and moved to the attic.
7. I would tell you a joke about pizza, but it’s too cheesy.
8. I entered ten puns into a pun contest to see if any would win. No pun in ten did.
9. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
10. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
Laugh Until You’re Thin: The Best Skinny Puns:
1. I wanted to be a baker, but I kneaded the dough too much.
2. I’m so skinny, I have to run around in the shower to get wet.
3. I tried counting calories, but I just kept losing count.
4. I’m not skinny, I’m just bony-fide.
5. I’m so skinny, I have a 6-pack… of hot dogs.
6. I told my wife I’d stop making puns, but she didn’t beleaf me.
7. I started a diet where I eat off smaller plates. It’s a little dish-couraging.
8. I tried making a belt out of watches, but it was a waist of time.
9. I tried to gain weight by eating more, but all I got was a larger grocery bill.
10. I heard a joke about amnesia, but I forget how it goes.
Funny Bone-Friendly Skinny Puns for a Good Time:
1. I’m on a diet, but it’s pretty hard to kale my cravings.
2. I joined a gym and started working on my core values… they’re mostly pizza.
3. I used to be an athlete, but I decided to take a running joke instead.
4. I tried to lose weight by drinking green tea, but all I got was green teeth.
5. I went to a seafood party last night; I pulled a mussel.
6. I started telling skinny puns to see if they butter up my friends.
7. I tried to lose weight by counting sheep, but insomnia gained the upper hand.
8. I’m trying to eat healthier, but I’m not sure if it’s working… my fridge is still full of cake.
9. I told my husband I wanted to be as skinny as a supermodel, and he told me I should aim for Wonder Woman instead.
10. I heard a rumor about butter, but I’m not going to spread it.