In this very funny pun compilation, we have come up with and collected the best old puns, dad jokes and wordplay to make you LOL.
Pun-tastic Classics: The Top Vintage Dad Jokes
- 1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
- 2. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
- 3. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
- 4. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- 5. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
- 6. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
- 7. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
- 8. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
- 9. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.
- 10. Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!
From Puns to Pizzazz: Hilarious Wordplay from yesteryears
- 1. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
- 2. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
- 3. Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
- 4. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.
- 5. I’m inclined to be laid back. That’s just my angle.
- 6. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
- 7. Some people don’t like puns, but they’re punbelievable.
- 8. What do you call a joke that is based on cobblers? A pun in laced!
- 9. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know why.
- 10. Why can’t you trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
Funny Throwbacks: The Best Old-School Pun Gems
- 1. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
- 2. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s table was Sir Cumference.
- 3. Every calendar’s days are numbered.
- 4. I’m writing a book on hurricanes, it’s a whirlwind of a read.
- 5. Why did Mozart kill his chickens? Because they always ran around clucking about Beethoven.
- 6. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
- 7. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- 8. I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
- 9. It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
- 10. The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.
Laugh Out Loud: Timeless Puns that Still Pack a Punch
- 1. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
- 2. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s table was Sir Cumference.
- 3. Every calendar’s days are numbered.
- 4. I’m writing a book on hurricanes, it’s a whirlwind of a read.
- 5. Why did Mozart kill his chickens? Because they always ran around clucking about Beethoven.
- 6. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
- 7. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- 8. I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
- 9. It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
- 10. The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.
Vintage Humor: Unearthing the Funniest Dad Jokes of the Past
- 1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
- 2. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
- 3. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
- 4. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- 5. Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
- 6. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
- 7. What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
- 8. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
- 9. I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.
- 10. Dad, did you get a haircut? No, I got them all cut!