In this very funny pun article, we have come up with and collected the best liquor puns, dad jokes and wordplay to make you LOL.
Pouring on the Puns: The Top 10 Hilarious Liquor Jokes
1. Why did the bartender break up with the gin? He couldn’t handle its tonic.
2. What do you call a drunk ghost? A boos-y spirit.
3. Why did the two pickles go to the bar? They were looking to get into a real pickle.
4. How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Look for the fresh prints.
5. What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive wine collection? A Winosaurus.
6. Why was the grape sitting on the bar stool? Because it was raisin the roof.
7. My friend brought a bottle of vodka to the party, but it was a bit watered down. I guess you could say it was just a shot in the dark.
8. What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear.
9. Why did the wine break up with the beer? It was tired of being treated like a cheap date.
10. Why did the whiskey go to therapy? It had too many issues neat and on the rocks.
Mixology Madness: Funny Drink Puns to Shake Up Your Day
1. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
2. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
3. Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fun guy.
4. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time.
5. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
6. What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
7. How does a snowman get around? By riding an icicle.
8. What do you call a fish wearing a crown? A king fish.
9. What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.
10. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
Raise a Glass to These Side-Splitting Alcohol Dad Jokes
1. What do you get when you put a candle in a suit of armor? A knight light.
2. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.
3. Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.
4. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
5. Why are ghosts bad liars? Because you can see right through them.
6. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!
7. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
8. Why did the potato start a fight at the party? It got baked.
9. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
10. Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.
Shots Fired: Laugh Out Loud with These Boozy Pun-tastic One-Liners
1. I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.
2. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
3. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
4. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
5. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
6. I’m friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know why.
7. Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.
8. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
9. I’m reading a book on the history of glue. I can’t seem to put it down.
10. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
On the Rocks with Laughter: The Ultimate List of Liquor Humor and Puns
1. Why did the beer go to school? For the hoptical illusions.
2. What happens to a frog’s car when it breaks down? It gets toad away.
3. Discovering the center of gravity was a weighty subject.
4. Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the Nobel prize.
5. Why did the farmer win an award? Because she was outstanding in her field.
6. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
7. A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.
8. Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.
9. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.
10. I’m having a hard time understanding infinity, but it’s probably never-ending.