In this very funny pun compilation, we have come up with and collected the best russian puns, dad jokes and wordplay to make you LOL.
1. From Russia with Puns: The Funniest Russian Wordplays
1. Did you hear about the Russian comedian who tells jokes about vodka? He’s always in high spirits!
2. Why did the Russian doll refuse to share her secrets? She didn’t want to spill the nesting details!
3. What do you call a Russian spy who’s also a musician? A secret chord agent!
4. Why did the Russian computer skip school? It had a byte infection!
5. How do you greet a Russian baker? With a loaf and peace!
6. Why did the Russian athlete bring string to the Olympics? To tie up the competition!
7. What did the Russian math teacher say to the geometry class? Let’s circle back to that problem!
8. Why don’t Russian vampires like garlic? Because it gives them Vlad breath!
9. What do you call a Russian potato that’s also a musician? A tuber player!
10. Why was the Russian bear always cold? He refused to wear a coat-ski!
2. Matryoshka Madness: Hilarious Dad Jokes from Russia
1. Why did the Russian farmer bring a ladder to the potato field? He heard the chips were down!
2. What did the Russian cat say to the mouse? Nyet means nyet, comrade!
3. How does a Russian musician get to work? By Tschaikov-ski!
4. What did the Russian pickle say to the jar? Dill with it!
5. Why did the Russian tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing!
6. Where do Russian cows go for vacation? Moo-scow!
7. Why don’t Russians play hide and seek with Ukrainians? Good Neighbors make good spies!
8. What did the Russian dinosaur say to its friend? Comrade-saurus!
9. Why did the Russian teacher go to the beach? To catch some Tsun-lessons!
10. How does a Russian astronaut cut his hair? Eclipse it!
3. In Soviet Russia, Puns Make You Laugh: The Best Russian Jokes
1. Why did the Russian weightlifter bring a book to the gym? He wanted to exercise his right to bear arms!
2. What do you call a Russian detective who’s also a magician? An investi-gator!
3. How do you organize a space party in Russia? You planet!
4. Why was the Russian dictionary so colorful? It had a lot of Tsar-search words!
5. What do you call a Russian snowman in the spring? A puddle of Putin!
6. Why did the Russian football team go to the bank? To get their quarterback!
7. How do Russian trees get online? They log in!
8. Why did the Russian philosopher go to the art gallery? To contemplate the brushstrokes of genius!
9. What did the Russian ghost say to its friend? “Spook-rasibo!” (Thank you for the scare!)
10. How did the Russian vegetable feel about being in a salad? It was rad-ish!
4. From Borscht to Banya: Russian Puns That Will Make You Giggle
1. Why did the Russian chef win the cooking competition? Because he had a Stalin secret recipe!
2. What did the Russian ballet dancer say to the ballerina? Let’s pirouette out of here!
3. How do you keep warm in a Russian winter? With some hearty laughter soup!
4. Why did the Russian tennis player go to the zoo? He heard they had a great serve!
5. What do you call a Russian bear who tells jokes? A funny fur ball!
6. Why was the Russian opera singer always smiling? She had arias for days!
7. How do Russian astronauts eat their soup in space? With a spoon-ski!
8. Why did the Russian dog sit at the computer? To keep it paws-itive!
9. What did the Russian traffic light say to the car? “Don’t rush in, I’m red-dy for you!”
10. Why did the Russian cat refuse to play hide and seek? Nyet again, comrade!
5. From Moscow with Laughs: Wit and Humor in Russian Wordplays
1. What did the Russian bear say to the beehive? “Honey, I’m home!”
2. How do you catch a Russian squirrel? Climb up a tree and act nutty!
3. Why did the Russian astronaut bring a broom to space? To sweep through the galaxy!
4. What do you call a Russian banana that tells jokes? A comed-nana!
5. How do Russian bakers cook their bread? With dough-mocracy!
6. Why did the Russian clock go to therapy? It had too many ticks!
7. What do you call a Russian ghost ship? A boo-ski!
8. How did the Russian painter know it was time to create a masterpiece? When inspiration struck like a Tsar!
9. Why did the Russian gymnast bring a ladder to the gym? She heard the bars were high!
10. What did the Russian pillow say to the blanket? “You quilt-y as charged!”