In this very funny pun compilation, we have come up with and collected the best cough puns, dad jokes and wordplay to make you LOL.
Coughing up Laughs: The Funniest Cough Puns to Make You Giggle
1. Why did the cough drop go to school? Because it wanted to be a little hoarse.
2. I told my friend a joke about a cough yesterday, but he didn’t laugh. He just wheezed it off.
3. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired from coughing.
4. My friend couldn’t stop coughing, so I told her to stop tickling her throat with feathers. She said, “I’m not, I’m using my fingers.”
5. Why did the cough take the day off? It was feeling a little phlegmy.
6. What do you call a coughing detective? A private spytomologist.
7. Did you hear about the man who could tell the future by listening to coughs? He had a clear-as-day-o-voyancy.
8. Why did the man wear headphones during a coughing fit? To drown out the sound of his own hacking.
9. What did the cough say to the sneeze? You’re nothing to “sneeze” about.
10. I heard a cough in the bakery today. It must have been a loaf-sawm cough.
Hilarious Dad Jokes: Cough Puns Edition
1. Did you hear about the cough that won an award? It was outstanding in its field.
2. My dad can’t stop coughing in the car. He must be driving me nuts.
3. What do you get when you cross a cough with a joke? A pun that’s nothing to sneeze at.
4. Why did the doctor go to school for cough medicine? Because he wanted to be a little hacking-titian.
5. I made a pun about coughing, but it just didn’t phlegm.
6. My dad’s cough sounds like a barking dog. He must be part retriever.
7. Did you hear about the dad who couldn’t stop coughing? He said it was just a phlegm-onomenon.
8. Why did the dad bring a suitcase to the doctor for his cough? He heard it was a “packing” cough.
9. Why did the dad cough while painting the house? He had a bad case of wall-ergies.
10. How do dad jokes and coughs go together? They’re both contagious.
Wordplay Wonderland: The Wittiest Cough Puns to Brighten Your Day
1. What do you call a cough that’s always late? A procrastination.
2. Did you hear about the cough who told a joke? It was a real belly laugh.
3. Why did the cough go to the symphony? For the “cough-phony” of music.
4. The cough had a party, but no one showed up. It was a real cough-fest.
5. I heard a cough try to make a joke. It was a real hoarse-laugh.
6. What do you call a cough that’s always on the move? A hitch-hacktor.
7. My cough sounds like a trumpet. Maybe I should join a “cough”-phony orchestra.
8. Why did the cough go to the dance party? It wanted to “Haka-choo.”
9. The cough tried to steal the spotlight, but it was always upstaged by a sneeze.
10. What did the cough say to the tickle in its throat? You’re really a pain in my neck.
Laughing Through the Coughs: A Collection of Funny Cough Puns
1. Why did the cough cross the road? To get to the other “phlegm.”
2. What do you call a group of coughs? A “hacking” choir.
3. My cough sounds like a seal. I must be a real “cough-tant.”
4. Why couldn’t the cough get a loan? It had no “collateral” lining its throat.
5. What do you call a cough that won’t stop talking? A real “hoarse” voice.
6. I heard a cough tell a joke, but it was just a bunch of hot “air.”
7. Why did the cough join the military? It wanted to be a real “hacking” hero.
8. My cough is so loud, it could wake the dead. It’s a real coffin-disturber.
9. What do you call a cough in outer space? A “hacking” astronaut.
10. Why did the cough go to the baseball game? It wanted to catch a “hack” fly ball.
Don’t Choke on These Cough Puns: The Best Wordplay Jokes You’ll Ever Hear
1. What do you call a cough that’s a picky eater? A “phlegm-atarian.”
2. My cough went to a party, but no one noticed. It was a real “Cough-tillion.”
3. Why did the cough go to the library? It wanted to check out some “phlegm-ing literature.”
4. What do you call a cough at a wedding? A “hacking” matrimony.
5. The cough tried to tell a joke, but no one got it. It was too “hacking” confusing.
6. Why did the cough go to the art museum? It wanted to see some “hacking” masterpieces.
7. I heard a cough make a pun, but it was just a real “hack-job.”
8. What do you call a cough that loves to sing? A real “hoarse” crooner.
9. Why did the cough go to the beach? It wanted to catch some “hack”-rays.
10. The cough tried to start a band, but no one joined. It was a real “cough-nundrum.”